Jessie J shares heartbreak of miscarriage after planning solo motherhood
Watch: Jessie J 'overwhelmed' by 'outpouring of love' following devastating miscarriage
Jessie J has opened up about the pain of suffering a miscarriage, after revealing her decision to have a baby on her own.
The 33-year-old singer shared an image of herself holding up a positive pregnancy test alongside a heartfelt message explaining that she had miscarried.
"I decided to have a baby on my own. Because it's all I've ever wanted and life is short," she wrote.
"To get pregnant was a miracle in itself and an experience I will never forget and I know I will have again.
"I'm still in shock, the sadness is overwhelming. But I know I am strong, and I know I will be OK."
Read more: New Zealand introduced bereavement leave for miscarriages – should the UK follow suit?
She added: "I also know millions of women all over the world have felt this pain and way worse. I feel connected to those of you I know and those of you I don't.
"It's the loneliest feeling in the world."
Alongside a broken heart emoji, the Price Tag and Domino singer revealed that having gone for her third scan on Wednesday she had been told there was no longer a heartbeat.
She was due to perform a gig in Los Angeles that night, and said she planned to go ahead with the show "because I know singing tonight will help me".
She added: "I want to be honest and true and not hide what I'm feeling. I deserve that. I want to be as myself as I can be in this moment. Not just for the audience but for myself and my little baby that did its best."
Jessie J has previously opened up about her fertility struggles on-stage as she revealed her “sadness” that she is unable to conceive a child naturally.
The singer reportedly made the revelation during a performance at the Royal Albert Hall in November 2018.
And last year the star hinted about her fertility struggles, while revealing that she one day hopes to be a mum herself.
Uploading a snap of herself as a baby to celebrate International Mother’s Day, the singer went on to applaud all mothers while also vowing to try to realise her own dreams of becoming a mother.
“Women are INCREDIBLE! I love you ALL. This is me when I was a baby. One day. I will be a mother,” she wrote in the accompanying caption.
Read more: Miscarriages: Why they occur, the mental health impact and the support available
Since sharing her heartfelt post, Jessie has been inundated with messages of support, many from others who have gone through similar experiences.
Ruth Bender Atik, national director of the Miscarriage Association, told Yahoo UK that the charity hopes Jessie will take some comfort in those messages.
"We’ve been so sorry to read about Jessie J’s miscarriage and the loss of her much-wanted baby – such devastating news, just when she had been thinking of announcing her pregnancy," she told Yahoo UK.
"We hope that she finds some comfort in the many messages of support posted online and also, perhaps, in the knowledge that by sharing her experience, she will have made others with similar losses feel less alone."
Jessie J joins a growing band of celebrities who have taken the carefully considered decision to share their own experiences of miscarriage and pregnancy loss.
Last year, actor Binky Felstead said she “thought long and hard” about whether or not to speak publicly about the miscarriage she experienced when she was almost 12 weeks pregnant.
Meanwhile Myleene Klass has also publicly shared that she privately suffered four miscarriages before welcoming her youngest child.
The singer revealed she had been encouraged to share her experiences in the hope of helping “even one lost soul”.
“I am Mama to seven babies, Ava, Hero, Apollo my rainbow baby and four little stars in the sky,” she wrote.
“I know after my own MCs [miscarriages] how I scoured the internet for stories similar to mine for peace, reassurance. I hope this helps even one lost soul.”
Watch: 'It's grief, it's trauma, it's sadness', Myleene Klass on miscarriage
And last year Meghan Markle opened up about her own pain after revealing she suffered a miscarriage during the summer of 2020.
In a deeply personal article, the Duchess of Sussex explained that despite how common miscarriage is, many still feel they have to carry the “unbearable grief” in silence and often feeling laden with “unwarranted” shame.
As many of the stars highlight in their own messages, there remains a stigma surrounding the discussion of pregnancy loss, which can mean many people feel forced to grieve alone.
It can, therefore, make such a difference to bereaved parents-to-be when celebrities and high profile figures speak out about their own experiences.
Experts believe celebrities discussing their personal experiences with miscarriage can help to break down the silence surrounding the subject and make others who have been through it feel like they aren’t alone.
“Whenever someone in the public eye shares the devastating loss of their baby in pregnancy, at birth or in infancy they are helping other people going through similar experiences to know they are not alone,” Clea Harmer, chief executive at Sands (Stillbirth and neonatal death charity) previously told Yahoo UK.
Read more: TV presenter Anita Rami says discussing miscarriages is ‘such a taboo’
That's something echoed by baby loss charity, Tommy’s, who previously told Yahoo UK that in speaking so honestly about their own experiences, celebrities will have gone some way in helping to break down the taboos that surround miscarriage and baby loss.
“Baby loss at any stage in pregnancy is one of the most heart-breaking things a family can experience,” says Tommy’s midwife Sophie King.
“One in four pregnancies ends in loss, but it’s a real taboo in society, so mothers sharing their stories is a vital step in breaking down that stigma and shame."
Referring to Meghan Markle's essay about her own loss, King went on to say that her "honesty and openness send a powerful message to anyone who loses a baby: this may feel incredibly lonely, but you are not alone.”
Where to go for support
For those enduring the loss of a pregnancy, support is available from hospital counselling services.
Numerous charities also have helplines offering support:
The Miscarriage Association: 01924 200 799, Monday-Friday 9am-4pm. It also has an online chat service and support groups
Tommy’s: 0800 0147 800, Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm
Petals, The Baby Loss Counselling Charity: 0300 688 0068. Counselling is free but calls are charged at the local rate
Some also like to have a memorial for the baby they lost, like The Miscarriage Association’s stars of remembrance.
