How Two Moms and Their Gay Sperm Donor Created Their Dream Family: 'Everything We've Ever Wanted' (Exclusive)

"I would just love to be able to educate and inspire other gay men to pursue this alternative and amazing path to parenthood," Dennis Kwan tells PEOPLE

<p>Dennis Kwan</p> Lorna Ciccone (left), Dennis Kwan (center), and Melissa Roumanis (right), hold their newborn daughter Ajla

Dennis Kwan

Lorna Ciccone (left), Dennis Kwan (center), and Melissa Roumanis (right), hold their newborn daughter Ajla
  • Lorna Ciccone and Melissa Roumanis dreamed of becoming parents, so did Dennis Kwan and all three were able to see their dreams came to fruition together

  • Ciccone and Roumanis, who got married shortly before their daughter's birth, met Kwan in January 2023 through a Facebook page that connects members of the LGBTQ+ community with sperm donors

  • “As much as he is the dad to our child, he is very much our partner,” Ciccone tells PEOPLE, adding that Kwan has already "brought so much to our lives"

Lorna Ciccone and Melissa Roumanis dreamed of becoming parents. So did Dennis Kwan. Thanks to a Facebook page that connects members of the LGBTQ+ community with sperm donors, all three were able to see their dreams come to fruition together.

With Kwan, 42, as their sperm donor, Ciccone, 39, and Roumanis, 37, were able to get pregnant, and welcomed daughter Ajla (pronounced Isla) on Sept. 25.

Now, the trio are exclusively opening up to PEOPLE about their journey and offering an inside look at how their special family came to be.

<p>Scott Irving</p> Lorna Ciccone (left), Dennis Kwan (center), and Melissa Roumanis (right) at Ciccone and Roumanis' wedding in September 2024

Scott Irving

Lorna Ciccone (left), Dennis Kwan (center), and Melissa Roumanis (right) at Ciccone and Roumanis' wedding in September 2024

Ciccone, a Naturopathic doctor, and Roumanis, a college professor, tell PEOPLE they knew they wanted to start a family together shortly after meeting over five years ago, and had been looking into options for two years before Kwan entered the picture.

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Kwan, a professional photographer, had always envisioned being a dad somehow. "But the way my life went, I travel constantly, always on the road, I realized that I really don't have room to be a full-time parent, whether or not I'm a single parent or partnered. So that's how this journey came about."

Shortly after he turned 41, he saw an episode of Lisa Ling's docuseries This Is Life called 'Got Sperm'. At the time he had no idea so many women were looking for donors and have to resort to sperm banks or strangers on the internet. "There are men who have hundreds of kids out there and are serial sperm donors. I just thought, 'Wow, this is crazy.'"

<p>Dennis Kwan</p> Dennis Kwan holds his newborn daughter Ajla after Lorna Ciccone gave birth on Sept. 25, 2024

Dennis Kwan

Dennis Kwan holds his newborn daughter Ajla after Lorna Ciccone gave birth on Sept. 25, 2024

That gave him an idea, and in January 2023, Kwan went to Facebook, found the “LGBT Sperm Donors” page and announced he was willing to donate, but only under certain conditions.

"I made a post that said, 'Hey, I'm a single gay man. I have this idea of being a sperm donor and I'm only interested in doing it if I can be involved. I only want to help make a child if I know it's going to be raised by great people and if I can be involved as a fun uncle.'"

In no time, Kwan says he received a “wild number of responses” to his inquiry, including from Ciccone and Roumanis who are based in Victoria, British Columbia.

<p>Dennis Kwan</p> Melissa and Lorna on the very first Zoom call meeting Dennis

Dennis Kwan

Melissa and Lorna on the very first Zoom call meeting Dennis

Both Ciccone and Roumanis were open to Kwan being a part of their child's life and they all clicked right away.

Kwan tells PEOPLE they “really hit it off” during their first, hour-long Zoom call together, and did so again the following month when Ciccone and Roumanis spent a weekend with him in California. "We all agreed that we felt like we hit the jackpot," Kwan recalls.

Related: Woman Welcomes Baby with Girlfriend, Ex-Husband Is Their Sperm Donor — and They All Live Together (Exclusive)

A short time later, the trio agreed to try and conceive together. After all parties signed legal agreements, they made their first attempt with an at home insemination kit in March 2023.

<p>Dennis Kwan</p> Dennis Kwan on the first Zoom call meeting Melissa and Lorna

Dennis Kwan

Dennis Kwan on the first Zoom call meeting Melissa and Lorna

After nine months of trying with no success, the trio opted to explore intrauterine insemination (IUI). "While you're on that journey, you wonder, 'Am I going to be one of those people that is able to conceive? Does my journey end without a child?' recalls Ciccone of the emotional fertility rollercoaster. Finally, she got the happy news they were waiting for: she was pregnant.

It was a special moment for Ciccone, who, like one in four women, has polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). For many years, she believed it would be difficult for her to get pregnant.

“The fact that we still were able to conceive, always just feels like a miracle,” Ciccone says.

<p>Dennis Kwan</p> Dennis, Lorna and Melissa's first meeting

Dennis Kwan

Dennis, Lorna and Melissa's first meeting

Related: Single Mom Welcomes Twins After Finding Sperm Donor Through Facebook: 'We Actually Became Quite Good Friends'

Before the baby was born, the trio had to answer some serious questions. Who would be on the birth certificate? (They ultimately decided both moms would be listed.) Would their daughter call Kwan “dad,” or something else?

"We had that conversation and he said, 'I'd be honored to be called dad, just as long as that's what you want,'" says Ciccone. "She gets to have two moms and a dad."

They also discussed what role Kwan would have in the family’s life. They hope to spend time together during holidays, family events, vacations and more, but they are all "flexible" with how it plays out.

<p>Scott Irving</p> Melissa Roumanis (left) and Lorna Ciccone (right) at their wedding in September 2024, before Ciccone gave birth to their daughter Ajla

Scott Irving

Melissa Roumanis (left) and Lorna Ciccone (right) at their wedding in September 2024, before Ciccone gave birth to their daughter Ajla

"Whatever relationship Dennis wants to have, we're so open and welcoming to it," says Ciccone. “As much as he is the dad to our child, he is very much our partner,” she says, adding that Kwan has already "brought so much to our lives."

Kwan is excited for the "new family dynamic" they've created, but also wants to make sure "to give them their space to have their family time too," he says. "The child's going to be half-Asian, so they're very excited for her to be connected to the Asian side of her family."

Related: Walmart Employee and Bus Driver Has Fostered 55 Kids — and Adopted 2: 'This Is My Calling' (Exclusive)

In August, Kwan and his mom Cathie Kwan were even present for the couple's wedding at Virgin Hotel Las Vegas. "She is this amazing light and fun, incredible bonus grandparent that we are so excited to have in our daughter's life," says Ciccone of Cathie adding, "We've also met Dennis's dad and his partner, and he is just an incredible, lovely human that we would be honored to play that role of grandfather.

<p>Scott Irving</p>

Scott Irving

On Sept. 25, Ciccone gave birth to Ajla a week early. " I can't believe she chose us to be her family," says Ciccone. "I have this thought every time I look at her."

Adds Roumanis: “When Ajla let out her first little whimper, it was the most magical sound. It's still hard to believe this is real — that we've actually brought someone into the world."

Both new moms are looking forward to creating the best life for their daughter and seeing the person she'll become. “I'm excited to have this really incredible opportunity to create this container of safety for someone to explore their own life,” Ciccone says.

<p>Dennis Kwan</p> Baby Ajla, who was born on Sept. 25, 2024

Dennis Kwan

Baby Ajla, who was born on Sept. 25, 2024

Kwan says he and the two moms are “already constantly in contact via WhatsApp,” and he's confident they will maintain a healthy line of communication. After getting news that baby Ajla was coming a week early, he hopped on a flight to Vancouver and officially entered his "Daddy era."

"It still all feels very surreal," says Kwan of meeting her for the first time. "I just stared at her. It was pretty magical."

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Now, Kwan is soft-launching a new service called Gayby, which helps match LGBTQ+ couples and single women with gay sperm donors.  The app will be similar to Tinder, “where people can just swipe” through their options and find matches.

<p>Dennis Kwan</p> Baby Ajla, who was born on Sept. 25, 2024

Dennis Kwan

Baby Ajla, who was born on Sept. 25, 2024

“Over the course of my own journey, I realized that there were many gay men out there who would be incredible uncle-dads also, who might desire this kind of relationship with someone - a couple or a single woman even," he explains. "I would just love to be able to educate and inspire other gay men to pursue this alternative and amazing path to parenthood."

Related: Oregon Mom Falls in Love with Sperm Donor 13 Years After Giving Birth to His Daughter

As she reflects on their journey, Ciccone says the experience has helped her see family life in a new perspective. “You don't have to be limited by the systems in place or the belief systems that you were raised with,” she tells PEOPLE. "You really can take a minute to create whatever it is you want.”

Roumanis adds, “If we can make something a little bit easier for the next person, I think that is the best thing that we could pass on.”

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