Woman's In-Laws Won't Accommodate Her Food Allergies, Now They're Mad She's Declining Invites to Family Meals
The woman's mother-in-law "decided it was too much hassle" to prepare a second meal for her
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Younger woman arguing with older woman in a stock photoA woman with severe food allergies is in a bind after her in-laws have refused to make meals she can eat. Now, as a result, she has to sit out of family get-togethers.
In a post shared to Reddit, the woman's husband writes that his wife is allergic to shellfish, peanuts, celery and soy.
"She's used to people not being willing to accommodate her OR being lazy about it and thinking they can make food with one of those things in it and just not putting it on her plate," he writes. "So she'll normally bring some food if people seem unsure about what to do."
And that's exactly what she did when the man's mom hosted a family gathering, bringing her own food because they anticipated there wouldn't be safe foods available for her.
"But when we got there mom was offended that she had brought food. We explained why and mom said in future she'd just make food my wife could eat," he adds.
At the next few family gatherings, the woman didn't bring her own food — but one day, after the man's mom "was not careful about food safety prep," she was served something cross-contaminated with shellfish.
After she had an allergic reaction, the man's mom "said she felt bad and apologized."
"But then after that dinner she decided it was too much hassle to make a whole other meal for my wife and then she started making one meal again but it was a meal my wife couldn't eat," he adds.
The situation ultimately led the man to have a discussion with the larger family, with his mom saying "it was unfair" that she be expected to cook multiple meals to accommodate his wife.
"So I told them it was for the best if my wife and I just didn't join them for these dinners," he writes.
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His family "did not like this decision" and now, he's facing criticism.
"I told them the health and safety of my wife comes first and since she can't win and she's not risking another allergic reaction eating there, and it wouldn't be fair to have her sit and watch us eat, then not going is our sole option remaining," he writes.
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As the man added in the comments, his mom "finds it rude to bring your own meal to other people's dinner 'parties' or family dinners. But she is not being provided food she can safely eat so the only other option would be she doesn't eat."
Reddit commenters have weighed in, with one writing, "What does your mother expect your wife to do? Sit there and watch everyone else eat?"
Added another: "There are thousands, perhaps millions, of dishes that do not contain shellfish or soy. If your mother wanted to, she could easily accommodate your wife's allergies."
