Dining across the divide: ‘Brexit hasn’t been as bad as I feared’

<span>Terry and Diogo. All photographs: Graeme Robertson/The Guardian</span><span>Photograph: Graeme Robertson/The Guardian</span>
Terry and Diogo. All photographs: Graeme Robertson/The GuardianPhotograph: Graeme Robertson/The Guardian

Terry, 81, London

Occupation Retired accountant

Voting record Describes himself as “old Labour”. Leave in the EU referendum

Amuse bouche In his late 60s, Terry walked across France, from the Channel to the Mediterranean, over four years

Diogo, 39, London

Occupation Biomedical engineer

Voting record From Portugal; “soft-left liberal”. Voted Labour in two UK general elections. If he’d been able to, he would have voted remain

Amuse bouche As part of a Portuguese-Spanish-British household, Diogo finds himself managing 13 passports and ID cards when they need renewing – “in itself a full-time job!”

For starters

Terry Diogo told me he did his postgrad at Imperial College London, and has a Spanish wife and two children. I did Spanish, and then VSO in Bolivia. My wife is Jamaican, and we’ve got two children and four grandchildren.

Diogo I thought: this is going to be interesting – in a good way. I told him I’ve been here for longer than I was in Portugal, which has unravelled a lot of emotions.

Terry I had soupe à l’oignon and the coq au vin. We shared a cheese board.

Diogo The food was lovely. I had beef carpaccio, then miso halibut.

The big beef

Terry For me, the EU referendum was about constitutional issues. I don’t think countries with common law systems (such as the UK) and Roman law-influenced countries (most of the EU), work well together. But the biggest benefit of Brexit is that there is now at least one place in Europe dissidents can go that isn’t bound by the European arrest warrant. The economic consequences haven’t been as bad as I feared. Imports from the EU and exports are slightly down, and I thought that was a good thing. International trade is quite bad for the environment in some ways.

Diogo What I’ve seen in my field of medical devices is a lot of that sovereignty has been wasted and nothing has been acted on. It looks unlikely that Britain will recover economically. The morning after the referendum, the first feeling I had was that the country I love is maybe not really the country I love.

Terry I went back to the 1975 referendum, and said the amount of lies told by what I suppose you would call the remain side was staggering. It had disastrous economic consequences and was one of the prime causes of Thatcherism. There was huge inflation. The majority who voted leave in 2016 remembered that. I think a lot of the vote was a protest.

Diogo But now that is affecting the lives of people who have no say if they are under 18. I’m glad my children, who have joint nationality, aren’t affected. I feel sorry for the young people who may not be able to travel or work abroad, or fall in love, with the freedom myself and my children have.

Related: Dining across the divide: ‘My friends expect a negative response when they say they’re British, which is a shame’

Sharing plate

Terry We’re both worried about the rise of far-right parties like Vox in Spain. We both dislike religions. I’m an agnostic, but about 99% sure atheists are right. I’m a Charlton Athletic supporter. He supports Benfica.

Diogo We agreed on a lot: what’s good about life, travelling, meeting other cultures, speaking other languages. We agreed that politicians go through some process that ends up weeding out decent characters from politics.

For afters

Terry I’m not opposed to immigration; my wife’s an immigrant. It’s simply numbers. If you take out the Scottish Highlands and bits of Wales, this country is extremely densely populated. There are too many people.

Diogo A lot of the decay in infrastructure in the UK has happened in the last decade, and it has affected everything from water to railways to building new houses and hospitals, and that leads to this feeling of overpopulation. My wife runs clinics in the NHS, and now it’s really hard to find the right staff.

Takeaways

Terry I really liked him. It was a pity it had to finish: he’s got two youngish children and a job, and I’ve got carer’s responsibilities – my wife has Alzheimer’s. I was probably a bit garrulous because I don’t really have anyone to talk to any more at home.

Diogo There were differences, but once you have a clear reason why you think something, then the differences are understandable. It was a lovely experience. He’s a lovely person.

Additional reporting: Kitty Drake

• Terry and Diogo ate at Provender, London E11.

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