Women Are Sharing The Friendship "Icks" They Get From Other Women

Most of the time, we talk a lot about the "icks" we can't stand in a significant other, so much so that we can often forget "icks" are just as possible with people you interact with on a platonic level, too.

So, I asked the women of the BuzzFeed Community, "What's a friendship 'ick' that you get from other women?" And here's what they had to spill:

1."When they seem to have a habit of talking about someone as soon as that person leaves the room. Rest assured, they do it to you, too."

2."A friend who will tell me everything about what happened to her, her husband, her kids, in-laws, and mutual and non-mutual friends in the past month that we haven't seen each other, but somehow never manages to ask me one single question about what was going on in my life."

–himalayall

3."Expecting your friends to be at your beck and call every time you text or call to get together. They shouldn't be nervous to say, 'Not tonight, girl; I wanna just be home with my family.'"

4."Regularly not responding to my texts or emails for over a month. It's ok if it happens once or twice due to difficult circumstances, but if it's a regular thing, you're getting downgraded to a close acquaintance. I need my friends to be there for me."

–madkz

5."Meeting up for lunch or dinner, and she complains about every item on her plate. Then complains about the waitstaff."

6."When they essentially want me to 'mother' them. I can be a nurturing person, but I am childless by choice, so I’m definitely not wanting to take care of a grown woman. I’ve ended a few friendships because of this behavior."

—Anonymous

7."The constant 'we need to hang out' and when you finally make plans to hang out, they spend half the time on their phone! Instant ick! Many friendships have faded after a couple of those types of hangouts."

8."When they can’t handle themselves in public places. If they’re loud and leave a mess behind, that’s a huge ick."

—Anonymous

9."When there is a five-alarm disaster multiple times a week with multiple long texts. Every little thing is the end of the world, 'triggering,' and/or 'traumatic,' and she is at the end of her rope."

10."Getting mad or jealous because someone else is wearing or has the same outfit, accessories, etc. We're in our 30s and live in a small world. Who cares!?"

—Anonymous

11."Judgement. Why can’t women agree to disagree instead of judging each other? I can disagree with your opinion or with the way you handled something and still be your friend."

12."When another woman wants me to 'chase' their friendship. If you want to be friends, be ready to put the same amount of effort into the relationship as me. If you aren’t, I will probably lose interest in growing the friendship."

"Don’t expect me to break your door down to hang out or ‘force’ you to attend a function with me. I will not beg you out of your own apathy, and it doesn’t mean I don’t care about you."

—Anonymous

13."The chameleon girlfriend. When your single friend gets into a new relationship, then changes who they are completely to be with the guy and basically ghosts you until they're single again. They expect you to wait around to play therapist when the relationship goes sideways. Ugh, I can't. You figure it out."

And finally, here's a controversial one that feels like most women have probably encountered it in one way or another throughout their lives:

14."When women say, 'All my friends are guys; girls are too bitchy,' it makes me want to run in the other direction. I can immediately tell they’re not a girls girl. I don’t want to be around someone who bashes other women."

Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity. 

Are you finding this a little too relatable and have your own friendship ick that really gets to you? Let me know in the comments!