This Woman's Brother Demanded She Cancel Her Vacation To Pay For His "Emergency Surgery"... And She's Not Wrong For Refusing

Welcome back to our little corner of the internet where we talk about other people's drama. Today, we're confronted by the story of a woman whose two-week European vacation is being threatened by family who think she should use the money on her brother's "emergency" dental surgery instead.

Here's the story from True-Strawberry-9409 (or Strawberry for short): "I (30, female) have been planning a two-week vacation to Europe with my partner for the past year."

"We’ve both saved up a lot of money for this trip, and it’s a big deal for us. We’ve never been on a major vacation together before. The flights, hotels, everything has already been paid for."

"Last week, my brother (35, male) called me in a panic saying he needs emergency surgery for a dental issue. It’s not life-threatening, but his tooth infection is bad, and it needs to be dealt with soon. He doesn’t have insurance (long story involving bad financial decisions), and the procedure is going to cost about $10K."

"He asked me to loan him the money, but there’s no way I have an extra $10K lying around after paying for this vacation. When I told him that, he got mad and said I should cancel my trip to help him, since 'family comes first.' He even suggested I ask for refunds on the flights and hotels, as though that would magically solve the problem."

"I told him I felt bad for his situation, but I wasn’t going to cancel a trip we’d been planning for a year over his poor financial choices, especially when this isn’t a life-or-death situation. He lost it, called me selfish, accused me of abandoning him in his time of need, and got our mom involved. Now, my mom is pressuring me to cancel and help him out, saying it’s 'just a vacation' and I can always reschedule," she continued.

"But I don’t think it’s fair that I should be expected to sacrifice something I’ve worked hard for because my brother can’t handle his own responsibilities. Am I the asshole?"

While there was sympathy for the brother's unfortunate situation, commenters agreed that Strawberry is definitely not the asshole.

Netflix / Via giphy.com

Strawberry has spent a year planning for this trip while her brother was apparently avoiding brushing his teeth. So, she shouldn't have to forgo her plans — especially since she won't be getting a full refund on their flights and hotels.

"Not the asshole," redditor Dry-Fortune-6724 commented. "Even if you 'cancel' your vacation, you aren't going to be refunded 100% and you would lose thousands of dollars. Never mind having to renegotiate PTO with each of your respective employers."

User imothro suggested she tell her brother, "My deposits are all non-refundable. So sorry bro, I can't help you this time. Hope it works out for you."

Others questioned why their mom didn't chip in for the surgery.

"And how much is mom contributing, since she's butting in?" user noplaceinmind questioned.

However, bigger theorists raised red flags over the brother's entire story.

"I used to be a dental assistant. There is no 'emergency' that is $10K. A tooth extraction with bone graft and implant don’t cost anywhere near that much," user susanbarron33 posed.

"My first thought was that was that this procedure isn’t going to cost that much," jasperjamboree agreed.

"My second thought was that bills from urgent dental procedures that aren’t covered by insurance are usually sent to his home after the procedure is finished. Even hypothetically if OP offered to pay, she could ask to see the bill/claim and pay the dental office directly.

My third thought was that... he doesn’t need the money for a dental procedure. He chose a dental procedure because it’s not like Strawberry can open his mouth and check that the surgery actually happened. That money would be gone GONE and Strawberry would have been funding another one of his shitty financial decisions. Not the asshole, he’s trying to scam you."

Scam or not, user PomegranateReal3620 reminded everyone that issues in the mouth should be taken extremely seriously, but the responsibility ultimately falls on the mouth's owner.

"Not the asshole, but I will put a PSA here. Tooth infections can quickly go south and become life-threatening. I've had two friends end up in ICU because tooth infections went into other parts of the body," they said. "Dude needs to get the infection dealt with, but you aren't responsible for paying for it."

What do you think? Is Strawberry's brother scamming her? Should the mom pay for it? Is there even an infection? Let us know in the comments.

Note: Some responses have been edited for clarity.