'Filler makes me look normal after being branded a freak for my long limbs and hollow face'
A young mum who was cruelly labelled a "freak" at school due to her rare condition causing long limbs, "deformed hands", and a hollow face has turned to filler injections in a bid to "look normal". Zoe Ridgway, a 32-year-old mum from Aberdare, South Wales, was diagnosed with Marfan syndrome at the tender age of 12.
Doctors initially suspected anorexia due to her "skinny and lanky" appearance. As she grew into her teens, Zoe's limbs lengthened unusually and her height shot up to 6ft (1.83m), leading to relentless bullying at school which severely impacted her mental health, resulting in multiple suicide attempts and depression.
Now, Zoe, who also suffers from Ehlers-Danlos syndrome – a condition causing flexible joints and stretchy, fragile skin – has 36-inch legs, nerve damage causing "deformed" hands, a 5ft 10in (1.78m) arm span, long fingers, crowded teeth, and a hollow face. Despite her height and span, she has size six feet.
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Walking is a struggle for Zoe due to her conditions. Feeling isolated, she started using filler injections in her lips, jaw and cheekbones at 29 to boost her confidence.
After sharing her journey on TikTok, she found others with Marfan syndrome to connect with. Zoe, who doesn't work due to her disability, told PA Real Life: "Bullying had a massive impact on my mental health and with the way I thought I looked, people used to say I was a freak."
Zoe's journey has been incredibly challenging, marked by deep personal struggles. She candidly confessed, "I tried to take my own life as a teenager a few times because of my self-esteem and I struggled with my mental health big time – I definitely had depression."
Zoe has also grappled with her appearance, sharing that she resorted to fillers in an attempt to conceal her Marfan syndrome, saying, "I try to change my face by having fillers because I can see I have Marfan syndrome and I don’t want other people to see it, I just wanted to look normal."
Amidst these battles, she ensures her daughter feels loved and confident, always telling her, "I always tell my daughter she’s beautiful inside and out, and that she’s perfect, and I don’t want her to grow up wanting to change her face like I did."
From the beginning, there were indications that Zoe faced medical challenges. Recounting her early years, Zoe said her mother sensed "there was something not right" with her from birth.
Described as a "floppy baby", Zoe had issues with her mobility and was flat-footed – so she had to wear a custom-made, lightweight brace to support her ankle and foot throughout childhood. At the age of three, Zoe was diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, and as she entered her early teens, doctors became concerned about her weight, fearing she might have anorexia as she necessitated a custom-made brace for her ankle and foot during her childhood. At three years old, doctors diagnosed her with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome.
Then, as Zoe entered adolescence, her exceedingly slim and tall stature raised concerns about anorexia. But it wasn't only Zoe; both sides of her family struggle with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, which they believe makes them one of the largest families in Europe to grapple with the condition.
Years of medical examinations finally led to a diagnosis of mitral valve prolapse—a heart condition at age 12—and Marfan syndrome. Her heart condition means Zoe experiences palpitations and faint spells, leaving her with little energy, something she finds more frightening than anything, as Zoe herself expressed.
Zoe recalled struggling to accept her Marfan diagnosis, having already been diagnosed with another condition. "I remember not being able to accept having Marfan because I’d already been diagnosed with something else."
She found it shocking, especially since she had always been an avid reader and had researched the symptoms, which she recognised in herself.
However, when she shared her diagnosis with others, she was met with confusion as no one knew what Marfan was.
As a teenager, Zoe experienced rapid growth, reaching 6ft tall with long limbs, which made her a target for bullying at school. She was subjected to physical abuse, such as being thrown downstairs and having her head shoved in a bin, as well as verbal taunts like being called a "freak" on her way home.
These experiences left her feeling extremely self-conscious, and the effects still linger.
Over time, Zoe's appearance has changed, with her legs growing to 36 inches long, which is considered extra tall by clothing brands like River Island. She also has nerve damage in her hands, causing them to be "deformed", and size six feet, which is unusually small for someone of her height.
Additionally, she has a 5ft 10in arm span, long and slender fingers, crowded teeth, an underbite, and a hollow-looking face.
Despite her efforts to hide it, Zoe admitted that she remains self-conscious, particularly about her hands and long limbs. "People don’t realise, but I’m still very self-conscious, especially about my hands and my limbs being long," she explained.
"It’s really hard because people don’t always think I have anything wrong with me, but I can see it, and it’s hard to explain to people."
To boost her confidence, Zoe began getting dermal fillers at the age of 29. These gel-like substances are injected under the skin to create a fuller appearance, helping her feel more confident in her own skin.
Zoe has been open about her cosmetic enhancements, including jaw fillers for a more defined look and cheekbone fillers for added plumpness. She's also opted for lip fillers to conceal her underbite.
Regular visits to the cardiology clinic remind her she's not alone, as she encounters others with Marfan syndrome. Although Zoe is the sole family member with the condition, she's relieved her daughter doesn't have it, despite a 50% risk.
Speaking candidly, Zoe expressed: "They (my family) understand my condition in terms of having joint problems but not how it affects my appearance and the impact it can have on your mental health."
Since 2020, she's taken to TikTok with the username @zoelr92 to spread awareness about Marfan syndrome, garnering over 22,500 followers. Her most viral video on the subject has hit 79,000 views.
Zoe shared: "I started posting in the February because it’s Marfan syndrome awareness month... I try to post relatable things for people with Marfans and teach people about it."
"I connect with quite a lot of people with Marfans on there, actually. I connected with somebody yesterday from Africa, and that was really nice."
"A lot of people have messaged me saying thank you for raising awareness about it, and people have said they think they have it because of my videos, then they’ve had a diagnosis. I find it really important to spread that awareness."
If you're in need of mental health support, reach out to the Samaritans at 116 123, send an email to jo@samaritans.org, or visit their website at samaritans.org.
