10 things you should do for your self-esteem every day
Developing good self-esteem is a bit like building physical fitness. It doesn't happen overnight, and it needs practice and persistence to turn your good intentions into results.
So how can you get started?
Here are some strategies to help you. If you tackle at least half of them every day, you'll come to like yourself more, believe in yourself more and feel much more confident. In other words, you will be well on your way to achieving good self-esteem.
1. Up your fruit and veg intake
Eat five fruit or vegetables a day. Better still, aim for 10.
Why? Because when you do something that you know is good for your health, you send a powerful message to your brain that you care and value yourself and that you think you're someone worth bothering about. Every time you do that, you'll increase your positive thinking about you.
2.Note down three things about yourself that you really like
These can be about how you look, or how you act. Then think about these good characteristics several times during the day. Please note that every day you do this task, you have to come up with three new points! When you do this regularly, you'll find yourself focusing on good aspects of yourself, rather than on what you don't like about you, or what you can't do.
3.Do a good deed for someone
A little kindness goes along way - and not just for the person on the receiving end. When we reach out and help someone else, we feel better about ourselves too.
4.Do half an hour of vigorous exercise
Go walking or running, play tennis or badminton, do a dance class, or kick a ball around in the park with your children or grandchildren. We all feel better about ourselves when we get moving, because when we do, we boost the levels of endorphins - which are 'feel-good' chemicals - in our blood streams. Getting active increases our happiness and helps us to feel that we're taking more responsibility for our physical health– and this kind of care for ourselves increases self-esteem.
5. Say 'no' to someone who's asking too much of you.
If you have poor self-esteem, you may well find yourself constantly pressurised into doing things for others that you haven't got time for, or don't want to do. So, only say 'yes' when it's appropriate and fair. Also, don't over-explain why you are saying 'no'. People with low self-esteem tend to feel that their reasons for refusal are not valid. But they are! So just say: 'No, sorry, I can't do that.' And leave it at that. It's important for your self-esteem that you don't burden yourself with tasks for other people – whether they're connected with work, friends or family.
6. Take half an hour for you
Painting your nails, reading a book, writing your diary, phoning a friend, learning to play the piano, going to Pilates … It doesn't really matter what it is as long as you feel better for it and that you get a bit of a breather from your routine.
7.Talk to three people you don't know
This can be on the bus, or train, in the supermarket, or at work. Just say 'hello' and smile, or give them a compliment about something they're wearing, or make a joke about the weather. Why should you do this? Because individuals with poor self-esteem often go around staring at the pavement and assuming that everyone else is more confident or better than them. You need to break that habit. And one of the ways of doing that is to be a friendly, open person. Initially you might have to force yourself to take the initiative in this way but gradually, you'll turn into a more sociable adult - and once you do, you'll like yourself more and other people will like you better too.
8.Tackle a task that you've been putting off
This might be something like sorting your finances, or clearing out your spare room, or beginning a healthier diet, or writing an important essay for an assignment, or doing your tax return. Whatever it is, the chances are that not doing it is causing you a lot of stress and unhappiness. So make a start. Getting on top of stuff that has to be done boosts your regard for yourself.
9.Contact a friend you haven't seen in ages
It doesn't matter whose turn it is to phone or text to arrange something. Just seize the initiative. People who don't value themselves highly enough often fail to keep in touch because they worry that they might be bothering the other person when they're busy. But the fact is that making the effort to be around people you like is very cheering, not just for you, but usually for them too.
10.Write a list of five goals that you want to achieve this year
Then give yourself a realistic time-limit in which to achieve these aims, and vow to work towards it. It's common for individuals with low self-esteem to tell themselves that they'll never be able to change jobs, or go on that holiday of a lifetime, or learn Russian, or lose weight – and to let all their good intentions drift on but never quite happen. However, if you form realistic aims, and give yourself an appropriate time scale in which to achieve them, you'll be amazed at what you can accomplish. And every time you do manage to make alterations to your life and turn some of your dreams into reality, you'll grow in confidence and happiness.
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