“He kicked the door down and ripped Aiden [their son] out of my arms. I’m following him, like…please give him to me, I’m nervous. I don’t think he’s going to hurt [Aiden] but he’s drunk,” Reidy explains. “Honestly I’ll never forget that. That feeling was like, you know when your dad yells at you when you’re a kid, and you’re like, “[Expletive]. I’m about to get a spanking.” It’s probably the scariest thing as a kid to feel. That’s basically what I can relate it to.”

Reidy says Russell had their son in one arm, and grabbed the front of her shirt with the other, throwing her across the room and onto the ground. “I was this close to my head hitting the coffee table,” she continues, “I just sat up and looked and he closed the bedroom door and had Aiden in there.” She went into the other room, and retrieved Aiden when she heard Russell go out onto the balcony. She fell asleep and woke up to him in bed with the two of them. Afterward, she was the one who felt like she had to apologize.

“He slammed me into concrete…like, football tackled me. His friend was there and Carlie was there and they watched it. I was down, he was on top of me, yelling in my ear, saying, “You like doing this to me. You push my buttons. Do you like it when I get like this? Do you like doing this? You like pushing me to the point where I have to act like this.”

Reidy says she agreed to come back to Chicago in May after Russell insisted he wanted to see his son. She wanted to see Aiden’s half-sister Mila for her birthday and figured it was an opportunity to see if he’d meant anything he’d told her about how he was trying to change. It was fine for “the first two days”, and then things went right back to how they had been before. “He said something rude to me, and I responded, “What, do I look like a maid or something?” I was sitting on the couch texting…obviously it pissed him off,” She remembers the kids were playing on a small trampoline by the TV. “He walks over and grabs me by my throat and pins me up against the couch. He’s like, “Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?” I had to pull my knees up and push him off.”

Reidy says she went to the bedroom to walk away from the situation and Russell followed her into the bathroom, shutting the door behind himself. “He’s yelling at me and then he literally bowed up,” She stops for a second to collect herself before continuing, “He bowed up his arm and I was like, “You know what? Go ahead. Fucking hit me. Just do it…it’ll be the last time you ever put your hands on me. Go ahead and do it.” Russell backed off, and Reidy believes that he knew she wasn’t scared of him anymore after that.

I can’t even begin to understand how someone is objecting to a childcare expense knowing they have zero responsibility in physically caring for the child. Since he abandoned us, thinking the grass was greener, about 4 1/2 years ago, I’ve never once been able to rely on my daughter’s father to care for her in a time of need or while I am working. He is absent from our daughter’s life for months at a time & yet he goes out of his way to make me struggle while I raise her on my own. His team of “advisors” feel they have the power to disobey a court ordered agreement just to save him a few bucks. It’s disgusting to know my daughter’s care and well-being isn’t a priority, the only goal is to decrease a money expense. How does someone continue to keep having children while neglecting to be an active, involved father to their first born’s life. I’ve taken the high road and kept quiet for years now. My daughter’s father has even gone as far to have the #cubs block me from social media as an attempt to silence me. I’m exhausted from my kindness being taken as a weakness. I’m sure the term loyalty is an unknown concept to him but trust me, it will be understood when I’m no longer loyal to people who take advantage of it.

Fun fact of my journey: about 3 years ago from today I was paid a portion of my child support in quarters and single dollar bills. About $600 total that I had to pack up and fly back home with. I remember being so confused how a family whom I genuinely cared about, could “love” Mila and I so much could sit back and stay silent. An event I forgave them for but have never forgot. That same trip I vividly remember shopping in toys r us for a Christmas gift for Mila’s little brother when I received a text message stating that my daughter smelled like “musk” and “dog poop” among other things as a result of my care. This event triggered my first anxiety attack which have only been increasing throughout the years. I called my moms best friend, I sat there and balled my eyes out and told myself I’d pick up my daughter & take the next flight out. We just kept talking to god and praying until I got everything out.