Former Miss Canada Siera Bearchell reflects on being in 'depths of motherhood hell'
The mother of two admitted that despite her best efforts, "it doesn’t seem to be enough."
Siera Bearchell is opening up about the difficult realities of motherhood.
On Tuesday, the former Miss Universe Canada took to Instagram with a set of three candid outdoor photos with her two children, paired with a note about her "4 a.m." thoughts on motherhood.
The 30-year-old posed in front of a mountain in Canmore, Alta., in a pair of beige ribbed leggings and a white cable-knit sweater, with her four-year-old daughter and eight-month-old son.
"I feel like I’m in the depths of motherhood hell," she penned in the caption. "My baby is so congested that he sleeps for increments of 20-30 minutes — maybe less, and wakes up crying, screaming for relief."
Bearchell admitted that despite her best efforts, "it doesn’t seem to be enough."
"I’m giving everything I have. I’m trying," she continued. "The dark cloud over me grows. The exhaustion settles in."
She explained while she knows the difficulties she's experiencing are "temporary," she still wonders "when I’ll feel like myself again. I wonder when I’ll be able to take my dreams and goals off pause."
"It feels like it never ends," she added. "I’m amazed that I have so much to give but I still feel like I fall short."
"I will slowly rise again. The fog will dissipate. The light will return. I will gather the strength I know I have because I am a mother," the mom-of-two concluded.
Bearchell later commented on her own post, assuring her fans that she is "okay."
"I’m OK, just sharing my thoughts from 4 a.m.," she wrote.
Bearchell's vulnerability quickly garnered praise from fans.
"Incredibly relatable," an Instagram user commented alongside a heart emoji.
"You're an amazing mother!," someone else added.
One person wrote: "I love the realness you share."
"Thank you for sharing this. You're so real and relatable. Sending you positive vibes! You got this!," a fan penned.
Last month, shared an equally honest Instagram post reflecting on the "trenches of parenthood."
"Your baby isn’t sleeping, your toddler isn’t sleeping, you can’t eat a whole piece of toast without getting up from the table multiple times, you forget who you used to be before kids," she shared.
Bearchell pointed out motherhood isn't just about raising her kids, but also "raising a new version" of herself, "who sets an example that shapes the life of these little eyes that watch your every move."
"I’m working on ways to better myself mentally and physically so I can be a better version of myself for both myself and them," the Saskatchewan-based influencer wrote.
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