Men Are Sharing Specific Things Society Expects Them To Enjoy, But They Actually Despise, And I Feel Like I've Been Lied To My Entire Life
I'm well aware of gender stereotypes when it comes to women and what society expects of us — however, I'm pretty clueless about how men feel about their stereotypes. So this Reddit thread filled with men sharing things society expects them to enjoy but that they don't care about at all is quite interesting. Here is what some shared:
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.
1."Career ambition. I work to pay the bills, nothing more. My career does not define me as a person or give me a sense of purpose in life. My free time is way more important to me."
2."Promiscuity and getting laid. Don't get me wrong. I'm not a prude; sex is great. But it's not some pleasure I've ever placed on a pedestal; it doesn't define my manhood. I've never been into 'fuckboy'/hookup culture — I can't be bothered to be honest. To me, sex is simply one of the best aspects of a healthy and meaningful relationship. Without a healthy and meaningful relationship, it's basically nothing to me."
3."Strip clubs. Why would I pay to get teased?"
4."Luxury and opulence. I do well financially but live relatively frugally. I drive an older vehicle. I don’t have any debt. I fix instead of replacing things. I prepare my own meals. I see many men trying to buy happiness or buying things they believe will give them clout. It’s not the way."
5."Sports. I literally could not care any less if I tried. I have no idea what’s going on in sports. So it’s an uncomfortable topic of casual conversation, as I don’t know anything about what’s happening in the sports world."
6."Competition. I hate it. I hate how it turns people into backstabbing, selfish assholes. I just want everyone to be kind to each other."
7."Cars. Almost all men start talking about cars with me and expect me to know all the brands by heart. They point at a car and be like, 'Oh, that's the Volvo F29 X ZETA 2027 edition!' and I'm like, 'That looks like a car to me.'"
8."Beer, I tried many, and the taste is just nothing enjoyable for me."
9.Talking about women sexually. I don't mind something like, 'Damn, she's fine!' but that's where it stops for me."
10."Outdoors activities. Hiking, mountain climbing, hunting, etc., is not for me. I'm what you call indoorsy."
11."Lawncare and giving a shit about grass and weeds."
12."For me, it has to be camping. Don't get me wrong, I love nature and the great outdoors, but spending the night in a flimsy tent with bugs crawling everywhere and no comfortable bed? Yeah, I'll take my cozy apartment over that any day. Sorry, society, I'll stick to glamping or day trips in the wilderness."
13."Typical external male markings of masculinity. It seems as if there are items like aggressive tattoos, leather jackets, or shirts with violent connotations that are expected of men. I cannot stand them. They seemed so overplayed. I am retired from the military also, so I don't have anything to prove to anyone from a masculinity standpoint. That may play a role."
14."Fishing. It's boring as hell, and I don’t like hurting animals. I would rather observe them in the sea than yank them out of it."
15."Rough sex. It holds very little appeal to me, but it seems like my sexual partners either don't believe that (probably because past men have wanted rough sex with them) or because they're into receiving that themselves. Even when I say I'm into being gentle in bed and only rarely into something more rough, it feels like my partners are waiting for me to start hurting them. I don't like the idea of hurting my partner in bed, and I feel judged and not believed for it. It feels like such a weighty expectation. It has broken down relationships in the past."
People who identify as men, is there anything else you could add to this list? If so, share it with me in the comments below!
