21 Times Women Faced Sexism At School, At Work, At Home, And A Bunch Of Other Places That Should've Been Safe For Them
Reddit user blueivy00 posed the question, "What is an example of sexism you have experienced?" The thread filled with a ton of upsetting stories, many from women. Here are some of the experiences they shared:
1."Today, I returned to work from maternity leave. My employer decided to revoke my leadership and supervisory responsibilities because I had been gone 'too long,' and they wanted to ensure I could 'handle them' after becoming a mom."
2."A guy at a bar with a ring on started flirting with me. When I told him I was married, he asked why I didn't wear a ring. When I explained that my husband and I don't wear rings (he never proposed with one) and that it's not our thing, he told me I shouldn't be at a bar if I'm married."
3."I was renovating my house, and the new door was having problems, so I called some guys to come fix it. At the same time, an electrician was also at the house doing some repairs. No man is living in my home. I was the one who called the door guys. I talked to them on the phone. I opened the door for them. The repair order had my name on it — a feminine name. I lead them to the broken door. They went to the electrician and asked if he was the house's owner because they wanted to explain what was wrong with the door. Oh, man, they got an earful from me. The electrician couldn't stop laughing."
4."In most family dinners that I’ve been to (with families that aren’t mine — friends, distant family, partners), the women are expected to set/clear off the table and clean up afterward. Sorry, as a female guest, I’m supposed to get up, but not the male family members?"
5."A kid was late to class every single day due to football. The teacher never said anything. I was late once because my locker was stuck, and I needed the janitor to help me. When I walked into class, the teacher said in front of everyone, 'She must have had to fix her hair.'"
6."How much my mother-in-law expects me to clean while her son just sits around. She seems genuinely offended when I mention her son taking care of something/cleaning up. One time, I told her I was waiting for him to put his clothes away after folding because he doesn't like how I do it, and she genuinely looked at me like: 🤔."
7."I had a much-needed breast reduction surgery last year, and in the final appointment with the surgeon, before I went into the hospital, he turned to my husband and asked if he was sure about this."
8."Being asked by a coworker to babysit his kid while he worked. We had the same hours."
9."My mother and grandparents had an overt preference for my brother. When I was a child, when I visited my grandparents, they would make me vacate the most comfortable seat in their living room for my brother. They also told me to wash his dishes after he ate because, according to them, this was my duty and not his. My mother expected me to be her care provider and never put the same expectation on my brother. Instead, she encouraged him to succeed in his career. At the same time, she discouraged me from moving abroad for work because she thought it was my duty to stick around to cook, clean, and care for her. She wanted to determine my career path, ensuring I wasn't 'too' successful. Thankfully, my father was more supportive."
10."People always consult and talk to my fiancé when expensive purchases are made, despite me paying for things 99% of the time. It's not his fault, but they figure he's more levelheaded because he's tall and stoic most of the time. He must be the boss."
11."One time in class, a guy totally interrupted me while I was presenting and said my ideas were 'cute' but not really useful. It was so frustrating because I had worked really hard on that project! It made me realize how often people underestimate girls. We must lift each other up and show girls we're just as capable!"
12."I was told I had to cover up my tattoos at a bartending position. This was back in 2017, and I didn't think it was that ridiculous until I saw the other bartender come in. He was completely covered in tattoos – not just his arms, but his neck. I asked my boss about it, and he said, 'Tattoos don't look good on women.' I just left. Now, I work at a fancy law firm and have my tattoos showing all the time. I'm glad things are changing. Also, speaking of tattoos on women, my guy friends said they don't experience strangers coming up to them saying, 'You'd look better without tattoos,' or 'Men look more attractive without tattoos,' but that's something I get often. Why is a stranger telling me what they find attractive?"
13."I started my career in the '90s, and as a woman in a male-dominated field, sexism happened to me every day. I made 60% of my colleagues' salary, even those junior to me. When I complained, they responded, 'They have families to support. You're just making fun money.' I was regularly on the receiving end of sexual harassment from clients, and my bosses told me to 'just enjoy the attention.' I had a client walk out when he realized he had to work with a woman. None of my coworkers ever made coffee or cleaned the communal kitchen because they assumed I would take care of it. My bosses created a dress code for me specifically, but my colleagues could wear what they wanted. The '90s sucked."
14."At my last job, I was told I wouldn't be considered for a promotion because 'I might get pregnant soon.' It felt like my potential was dismissed based on assumptions about my gender."
15."When I inquire about a possible military discount (because there is a sign), and they turn to my husband and thank him for his service. Meanwhile, I have my ID out already."
16."A physics teacher in eleventh grade gave me a B because 'girls don't get an A.' That was 25 years ago."
17."My first memory of experiencing sexism was when I was in first grade, in my tiny little Texas hometown, and we were all asked what we wanted to be when we grew up. I said I wanted to be an astronaut, but I got laughed at and was told that girls could not be astronauts. This was before Sally Ride. It also happened as recently as last month when I had a guy in to fix my washer, and he kept trying to talk to my partner rather than me when it was clear that I had made the call for service."
18."I am on the young end of the spectrum for priests (31) and female. A man in his 60s recently asked me if I was the 'young pretty face' hired to bring in more men to the congregation because it was working on him. I replied, 'Yes, I'm just the diversity hire,' and smiled blandly until he left."
19."My (male) friend and I each got an engineering internship at the same company. We had the same credentials, course history, grades, and discipline. He got to work in the R&D lab, developing and treating circuits. I got to sit at the computer making process flowcharts for the company."
20."I had a brother who was exactly one year older than me and one grade above me. We had the same friends; he was a football player, and I was a cheerleader. We did nearly everything together. However, he was allowed to go to parties, but I was not. He was allowed to go out of town with friend's families, but I was not. He was given a curfew for the weekends, and I simply wasn't allowed to go anywhere. He was allowed to date, but I was not. It led to me having a lot of secrets, but in reality, I was just trying to be a normal kid. I remember I got caught lying about where I was once because my car broke down, and I had to call my dad. Where was I? Ice skating. I had to lie to go ice skating at 17. Even my brother would help me sneak out sometimes because the rules were unbelievable. All of my friends were very good kids."
21.And: "I (F) was a team manager (all men), and we all needed to start driving box trucks for a project, so I got a training company to come and give a course to everyone on my team on driving large vehicles. I went in last. First, the guy assumed I was the assistant or secretary. Then, he commented on how women are worse drivers, and it may be difficult for me to get a handle on it, etc. I grew up on a farm. I drove tractors before I drove a car. Also, I was in the Army, and before requalifying, I had trained as a truck driver."
Women, have you ever experienced sexism in an environment where you thought you'd be safe and/or respected? What happened? Tell us in the comments or submit your story anonymously using this form.
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
